an autobiography....of a cooking pan

Screech screech screech shriek scratch and scratch ... can’t you be a gentle on me. You know I have a sensitive skin. If you continue rubbing so hard against me I’ll have my entire face bruised in no time. Ouch ouch ouch!!! That hurts! Stop it , I say . Just stop it!At least put some of that thick slimy liquid so that the lather protects my skin. Gosh I am so scared. I am telling you it’s so not easy being cooking pan. I alone know what torture I am subjected to each and everyday of my life, and there is no one I can even complain to about all this mess. Do you know what happened last night ? NO, obviously not! How would you know. You just sit here in this cosy . Well anyway.. .. so I was telling you about what happened yesterday. This mortal picked me up at the middle of the night to satisfy his hunger pangs , and of all the things in the world he decides to cook these snake like thing in me. I so detest them as they always stick on to me like glue. So he puts this thing on me and totally forgets about it while I burn my ass off on those hot flames for a good 45 minutes, and when he came back half of that snaky stuff ((think they call it something named ‘maggi’) was stuck on to me for eternity.Ah!!! That’s why I had come to you for a quick scrub massage to exfoliate my skin and get that glow back. !